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But I was already walking away. I left him there, surrounded by half-eaten tacos and the quiet hum of a restaurant that suddenly felt colder than ever.
That night, after the babysitter had left and the kids had fallen asleep, I sat on the edge of Clara’s bed. Her little fingers were curled around her stuffed elephant. Jake had given it to her the Christmas before.
A stuffed elephant toy | Source: Midjourney
A stuffed elephant toy | Source: Midjourney
I ran a hand through her curls and kissed her forehead. Then, I went over to Cole’s side of the room. My eight-year-old little boy. He had left a comic book open on his bed, the pages crumpled. I tucked it in for him, pulled the blanket up to his chin, and stayed there for a minute.
They didn’t know about my separation from Jake yet. I hadn’t told them and maybe I wouldn’t even tell them the truth behind it. Because kids shouldn’t have to carry the weight of adult disappointment. They deserved so much more than that.
Later, I stood in the kitchen, staring at the fridge door. It was cluttered with drawings, lists, notes in Jake’s handwriting.
“Movie night, Friday?”
“Clara loves strawberry jelly now, update the PB&J ratio!”
I pulled one off. And then another. I kept going until the surface was bare. And that’s when I cried. Quietly. Not for Jake. But for what I thought we had. For the belief I held that someone could step into our lives and really stay.
For the trust I had offered like an open palm.
An upset woman sitting at a kitchen table | Source: Midjourney
An upset woman sitting at a kitchen table | Source: Midjourney
I watched them eat for a moment, just taking them in, trying to memorize this peace before I shattered it. Jake had spent the night at his mom’s place, he’d arranged to come over later and pack up the rest of his things.
“I need to tell you something,” I said gently.
A plate of waffles | Source: Midjourney
A plate of waffles | Source: Midjourney
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