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There are moments that never truly leave a woman.
They don’t fade with time or soften with distance. They settle into the body—into the spine, the breath, the quiet reflex to flinch when the air turns cold or when a certain tone of voice drifts too close. Years later, they return uninvited: as a tightness behind the ribs, a tremor in the hands, a dream that smells like rain and pavement.
At the time, I didn’t know that by the end of that night, her smile would be gone forever.
I didn’t know that blood would stain the concrete, or that truths buried for decades would claw their way into the open.
I didn’t know my unborn son would fight for his life before he ever took a breath.
All I knew was this: the rain was freezing, my body ached in places I hadn’t known could ache, my baby felt impossibly heavy inside me, and the woman who was supposed to be family was enjoying every second of my struggle.
The trunk of the town car stood open before me.
Inside were six grocery bags, swollen and sagging under the weight of glass jars, wine bottles, milk cartons—items carefully chosen to be as heavy as possible. I stared at them, calculating angles, grip, balance, wondering how I was supposed to manage this incline without falling.
I looked up.